One of the pleasures of creating and maintaining The Inspirations' website
has been the opportunity to correspond with so many friends of long-standing and to make
new friends. While we are sometimes a little slow in responding (we receive a tremendous
number of emails each week and still type with two fingers), please know that we will
answer your message in as timely a fashion as possible. Better yet, call me
at 828.497.2060 between the hours of 10 AM and 5 PM, eastern, and I
will do my best to answer your question (if I know the answer, that is!)
On the other hand, one of the trials of having the main email address
is that we receive forwards on almost every subject imaginable. We do appreciate receiving
the serious ones, so please don't let this message stop those. When you find an uplifting
or heartwarming story, or discover a terrific Christian website, please pass it on. We
do enjoy receiving those and visit almost every referred site.
However, if you are one of our friends who forwards every alarmist
message you receive to every internet buddy you know, please take a few minutes and read
the following message. Although it is somewhat tongue in cheek, it is based in reality.
To get your mind tuned in, let us pose what should always be a basic
first question: |
1.
Big companies don't do business via chain letters:
-Bill Gates is not giving you $1,000
-Disney is not giving you a free vacation.
-There is no baby food company issuing class-action checks.
-Procter and Gamble is not proven to be a part of a satanic cult or
scheme, its CEO did not appear on
Sally Jessy Raphael, and its logo is not necessarily
satanic. If you send $3.00 for a SJR transcript as the forward
suggests, you will have lost $3.
-MTV will not give you backstage passes if you forward something to the
most people.
(Note: Frankly we couldn't
care less about this one for any reason!)
You can relax; there is no
need to pass it on "just in case it's true."
-Furthermore, just because someone said in a message, four generations
back, that "we checked it out and it's legit,"
does not actually make it true. Most of the time, the
stories are bogus, no matter the claim.
2. There is no kidney theft ring in New Orleans. No one is waking up in a bathtub full of
ice, even if a friend of a friend
swears it happened to their cousin. If you insist
on believing the kidney-theft ring stories, and I quote: "The National
Kidney
Foundation has repeatedly issued requests for actual victims of organ thieves to come
forward and tell their
stories. None have." That's "none"
as in "zero". Not even if your friend's cousin says it's so!
3. Neiman Marcus doesn't really sell a $200 cookie recipe. And even if they do, we all
have it. And even if you don't,
you can get a copy at: http://www.bl.net/forwards/cookie.html
Then, if you make the recipe,
decide the cookies are
that awesome, feel free to pass the recipe on.
4. If the latest NASA rocket disaster(s) DID contain plutonium that went to particulates
over the eastern seaboard,
do you REALLY think this information would reach the public via
an AOL chain letter?
5. There is no "Good Times" virus.
-In fact, you should never, ever, ever forward any email containing any
virus warning unless you first confirm that it
actually exists through an actual site of
an actual company that actually deals with viruses.Try: http://www.norton.com
-And even then, don't forward it.
If it is real and dangerous, you can bank on it that it will be
on Fox News, CNN or in USA Today.
-And you cannot get a virus from a flashing IM or email, you have to download....ya know, like, a FILE!
6. There is no verified gang initiation plot to murder any motorist who flashes headlights
at another car driving at night
without lights.
7. If you're using Outlook, IE, or Netscape to write email, turn OFF the
"HTML encoding." Those of us on Unix shells
can't read it, and don't
care enough to save the attachment and then view it with a web browser, since you're
probably
forwarding us a copy of the Neiman Marcus Cookie Recipe anyway! (Ron's Note:
We do not download unsolicited
attachments from anyone we don't know, and even then we first check with the
original sender). 8. Craig Shergold (or Sherwood, or Sherman, etc.) in England is not dying of cancer or
anything else at this time
and would like everyone to stop sending him their business
cards. He apparently is no longer a "little boy" either.
9. The "Make a Wish" foundation is a real organization doing fine work, but
they did have had to establish a special
toll free hot line in response to the large number of
Internet hoaxes using their good name and reputation
It is distracting them from the
important work they do.
10. If you are one of those persons who forwards anything that
"promises" 'something bad will happen if you 'don't ',
then something
bad will happen to you if I ever meet you in a dark alley.
I promise! LOL
Ron's
Note: This was in the original forward, and we couldn't resist leaving it in, even though
we probably wouldn't
follow through on it. SEE KEYWORD: PROBABLY
11. Women really are suffering in Afghanistan, and PBS and NEA funding are still
vulnerable to attack (although not at the
present time) but forwarding an e-mail
won't help either cause in the least. If you want to help, contact your local
legislative
representative (if you believe you can trust even them) or get in touch with Amnesty International or the
Red Cross. As a
general rule, e-mail "signatures" are easily faked and mean nothing to anyone
with any power to
actually do anything about whatever the competition is complaining about.
12. There is NO BILL PENDING before Congress that will allow
long-distance companies to charge you for using the Interne.
13. If you still absolutely
just have to forward that
10th generation message from a friend,
at
least be thoughtful enough to trim the eight miles of headers showing everyone
else who's
received it over the last 6 months. It sure wouldn't hurt to get rid of all the
"> > > >"
and empty space that begin each line either. Besides, if it has gone around that many
times we've probably
already seen it.
The > > >s can
be easily removed by clicking on FILE, then
EDIT, then REPLACE. Put the
>
in the REPLACE BOX and hit ENTER,
and watch them disappear. Your friends/family that do receive all your
useless spam will like you a little better, but 'just
a little'. GET IT?
14. And last, but certainly not least -given the number of times we have received this one
over the years-
there is no Madelyn Murray O'Hair petition or bill before Congress; This hoax has
been on the Internet since at least
since Al Gore invented it, (sorry, couldn't resist) and it wasn't true even then.
FACTOID: According to reliable news sources, O'Hair has now met God and without a doubt
has finally realized
how foolish she really was.
Think about it! -Dead people don't get a hearing in the U. S. Congress.
|
Now, forward this message to ten friends,
and you will win the Publishers Clearing House sweepstakes.
Really! ROFLOL
NOTE: For those of you who will email and ask,
that means "rolling on the floor, laughing out loud."
And THAT'S A FACT WITH OUR HANDS UP!
--------- Copyright, 1999, HeavensEdge
Communications, All Rights Reserved ---------- |
